Small positive actions create positive feelings, and positive feelings lead to positive thoughts, and positive thoughts create positive results.
The wisest woman I know, my mom, always says "if you want to feel good do something good." There is a lot to be said for this simple advice and it can change the way you feel about yourself because the act of doing helps rewire your thinking.
“Do something. Anything. One thing. The smallest action despite how lousy, defeated, or uncertain you may feel can offer you a lifeline to the next moment. Why? Because motion creates emotion. And you want to feel better, right?”
But First...The result is always 100% proof of the original thought.
Stick with me here. If you want to change your results then you must change your thoughts. It is always important to identify the negative thoughts that sabotage our bright futures and find new thoughts that align with our true values. How does that work? Together we identify your values for each arena in your life, realign thoughts, feelings, actions. We talk. We plan. Through this work you recognize that YOU ARE ENOUGH. Period. This is uncomfortable work because you are required to be vulnerable, and honest, and emotionally adult; but it works. This is the way you create lasting transformation. Now remember I said it is important to first always identify those negative thoughts and replace them with positive thoughts?
Blah, Blah, Blah... let's get to the how you are going to change my life.
First, this change is in your hands. Second, I like your eagerness. Sometimes we just need to start with action. Why? Because, as mom said, doing something good can make you feel better and those positive feelings are what we humans are really seeking. Unfortunately people often take short cuts to get to those gratifying feelings and when they don't last, because they are founded in shame, the pattern of bad decisions and bad feelings and negative results repeat. Taking positive action helps break that cycle and gives you a glimpse at the future that awaits you. It helps rewire your brain by reinforcing positive actions with positive feelings. It's a chemical thing we can discuss at another time. Very sciency.
I thought I was supposed to take massive radical action to transform my life?
Either way. Up to you. But sometimes we are not capable of massive, radical action. And action alone, not matter how big, is not enough to create lasting transformation if you do not get to the root of what has created your unhappiness (hint: it is almost always based in self-worth.) But small actions can have a profound and lasting effect in your life and are often easier to make happen on a daily basis. Hell, sometimes a small action like taking a shower or making a bed can be monumental.
How do you go about identifying when and where to take action, which one is going to work, how often? There is no one single action that is guaranteed to make you happy and make your wildest dreams come true. That is the point. Pick one thing. Do it. Repeat. It's sort of a lego thing. One plastic brick (or action) at a time. Every day. Here is an example, many years ago I was trying to reclaim my health and I decided I was going to exercise every day no matter what. As a single mom who worked full time, with no exercise experience, how long do you think that lasted? 25 years and counting. Because I also decided if that meant walking in place for 10 minutes or doing crunches and push ups in my pajamas before I climbed into bed I was going to do it. And the significance of that is for me and not for another living soul.
I would tell you that eating your veggies, drinking water, exercising, and getting good sleep will change your life but I am guessing some of you would tell me that if those are your problems then you don't have real problems. I disagree. Bigger problems exist and sometimes seem insurmountable. So we start where we can with what we have. Take control where you can. The smallest of actions can lead to good feelings not to mention better physical chemistry which is a topic that we'll address in depth at a later date. Again, very sciency.
But I am too broken, depressed, messed up exhausted, or physically incapable to do anything.
It does not matter where you find yourself. What your circumstances are. You are not beyond hope. Never. And one small action may not solve all of your problems today but it will give you that glimpse of a better life. A happier, healthier life. The one you deserve. Sure there is probably more work to do and you may need more than coaching. You may need clinical help. Go get it and f*ck anyone who chooses to judge you for taking action.
If massive, radical change is not within your current reach small action is within your reach. Transformation is in the doing and will power doesn't last but habit does.
Wishing you a happier & healthier life,
Denile